Divorce can be a grueling process. While you’ll be forced to navigate challenging legal issues such property division and child custody, you’ll also have to cope with the emotional realities of your situation. That can be hard to do under any circumstances, but your marriage dissolution may be even more difficult if your relationship with your spouse is fraught with contention.
In fact, if you’re reading this post, then you may think that your spouse is an incessant liar who will say anything necessary to get what they want. While you might be tempted to give into their demands as a way to get through your divorce more quickly, you should avoid doing so.
Tips for effectively divorcing your lying spouse
Instead of throwing in the towel in your divorce, you should find ways to make the process less contentious while also rendering your marriage dissolution more grounded in the truth. That may sound impossible to do, but here are some steps that may prove useful:
- Minimize direct communication: Face-to-face communication with a lying spouse might only lead to heated arguments that accomplish nothing other than throwing up more roadblocks to your divorce. By reducing your face-to-face communication, on the other hand, you can reduce conflict and target your statements toward the relevant legal issues before you. Your attorney can also help serve as a filter so that these communications are as efficient as possible.
- Don’t take it personally: Your spouse’s lies can feel like personal attacks. Although they might be, there’s probably a deeper seeded issue that’s spurring the conflict. Your spouse may be significantly hurt, in denial, or simply trying to make sense of it all in their own way. They may even have a mental health issue that’s contributing to their demeanor. If you can view your spouse’s behavior through this lens, then you might gain better understanding, which can help deflate at least some of the tension that’s present in your divorce.
- Have backup evidence: If your spouse is going to keep lying about important issues, then you might want to try to contradict them with direct evidence. The specific evidence that you need will depend on the issue at hand, of course, but be diligent in looking for ways to put their claims to rest.
- Don’t give in where it matters: One way to quell your spouse’s rancor is to let them win on certain issues that really aren’t that important to you. But you shouldn’t let their lies or their bullying personality push you into agreements that are contrary to your best interests or your children’s best interests. Instead, hold firm on those issues that matter to you.
- Find support: We know that dealing with a lying spouse during the divorce process can be infuriating. You shouldn’t try to handle the stress of it all on your own. Your family and friends can help support you during these trying times, but you might also want to seek out support from a therapist or even a support group.
Don’t forget about your legal strategy
Another way to ease stress in your divorce is to have a sound legal strategy that you have confidence in. An attorney may be able to help you analyze the facts of your case so that you can craft the legal arguments and negotiation tactics that are right for you under the circumstances, which is why now may be a great time for you to reach out to an advocate of your choosing to start the process.