For those that marry and divorce young, they likely feel a stigma. They may feel alone, and they may feel like a failure. However, this is simply not the case.
First of all, divorcing young is not uncommon. We all know the much-debated statistic that half of all marriages end in divorce. As it turns out, divorcing young is also fairly common as well. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, for those who marry young, nearly a quarter are divorced by 34. And, if that number goes up to 50% over the course of one’s life, then that can hardly be counted as uncommon.
Not a failure
A divorce has nothing to do with effort. It has nothing to do with one’s personality traits. It is simply something that occurred. Do not internalize it.
Divorce support groups can be a great way to meet other young people in the same situation. It can also be a healthy way to work through our emotions communally.
For those that a divorce support group is not enough, choosing therapy is healthy. Knowing when to ask for help is often the hardest step to a healthy life. It is not only about talking with someone, but also about learning how to communicate, manage emotions, when to internalize and externalize, etc.
This will feel weird and maybe, silly, but practicing daily affirmations can help pull some through difficult times. Negative messages, both internally and externally, need to be balanced, which is what daily affirmations accomplish. According to experts, some good daily affirmations include, “My happiness matters more than the judgment of others.” “Divorce is not failure.” “It wasn’t working anymore, and that’s okay.” Make up new ones, write them down and then put them near a mirror. Look at them every day, read them and say them out loud.
This too shall pass
For Gulfport, Mississippi, divorcees, remember, this too shall pass. As long as one does the work to move on and accepts themselves, brighter days are head.